Don’t Walk, Skip

Samuel Washington can’t keep up! Let’s face it, no one could keep up. I am reminded of a recent question posited by some random girl on the internet: Why don’t we, as human beings, skip more? Why is skipping looked down upon? We can get places 2-3x faster if we all skipped. As a social experiment, I have begun skipping to and fro and it was amazing! I was making great strides in my paper route productivity. Also, I was becoming a giggler…oblivious to the world, brimming with pride due to my new “speed demon” nickname (I gave it to myself). But then…I experienced the fatal flaw. I tripped. That random internet girl didn’t warn me if you trip while skipping, it’s the equivalent of loading yourself into a catapult and being shot out of it with ballistic force to your bodily demise. Both my knees are irreparably damaged. I have to wear actual caps on my kneecaps just to compensate for the loss of limb (yes I am using mini top hats…what do you take me for?!). In any case, Sammy….try skipping. Just keep an eye out for tripping hazards such as rogue tree roots or litter. And if, by a twist of fate, you find yourself catapulted into the air….well, I got nothing, you’re screwed. But at least you can wear top hats on your knees like me 🙃 They tip themselves with each step you take AND they go great with a cane! 😁